The schedule.

Get up;
Breakfast;
Shower;
Study;
Short Breaks every now and then;
Evening Snack, Slack;
Study;
Dinner;
Exercise. 

The healthy schedule to be followed till November 8th.
Diversion from schedule can be noxious for health; belief and will.
You shall be lambasted to bits and pieces.
You shall not pass or enjoy the rest of your life.
You shall live the rest of your life with unbearable regret.

All these rules are applicable till November 8th; "The life" ends on November 8th.
A new life begins afterwards; a better one.
If impeccable with timing, it can be the probable solution to the long lasting hazardous addiction.
No more bilking around.

Interval

The interval between masturbation has been prolonged to three to four days, which is a good news. Listening to Quran on daily basis has helped me recover relatively faster. Last night I missed my recitation and tonight I was masturbating. I now know that I need to be consistent. No significant progress has been made, personally, on my ideals. Tough luck. Guess, I have to focus more on studies or else I'll fail, the last thing I want is to fail. May Allah help me recover faster for I still hope. Above all, I believe.

FML. Have. To. Stop. Now.

Too much to handle. The continuity is eroding my will power and the guilt I have left inside me. Resorting to words isn't helping anymore. At this rate I'll run out of solutions  ! Even 'Helping Hand' wasn't able to rejuvenate my will power. I have to do it myself. The only way to stop is to stop at will before it's too late. Steps:
1) Stop Procrastinating
2) Do what you have to do.
3) Do it now.
4) Do it yourself.
5) Be spontaneous.
6) Form a to-do list.
7) Stick to it.
8) Read this everyday.

Still Falling

So after four days of successful restriction and self-control, I tripped in the pit, on purpose, and haven't landed  yet. And I believe that landing is going to be pretty hard. This is my second time masturbating after the four day success and that consecutive. Any significant progress?  I don't think so. Time to look at the basics then: Why am I Masturbating? And, Why am I not stopping?


The first masturbation was an act out of pure curiousness. I always wondered what is this thing masturbation people always talked about so the blame for getting me involved in this mess goes to the internet and the people. Now comes my part of continuing this deleterious practice. Well, I just continued masturbating. That's it. And I couldn't stop. No matter how hard I tried, something would trigger these awful feelings, probably my hormones,  that I could not manage to control. I never tried. Further, I would always find an excuse to masturbate, be it my angry dad, a bad day, bad grades, socially embarrassed or just a little horny scene in a movie. The thing is  I never tried, because trying is 'hard' and I'm not strong enough for that. I am too lazy, and here I go again making all sorts of excuses to escape. I need to stop making excuses, I promise, like I do every other night and fail afterwards, making me feel miserable for the next whole day and committing same thing in the night ! I fucking need to get a life. Literally.

I've grown thinner, my knees are weak and I run out of breath. All are the signs of excessive masturbation ! From this point onwards I'll continue to write as it has helped me and add some other productive hobbies to my schedule. I'll try to stick with my religion, morals and values, and most of all I'll try listening to my parents because I just realized Allah's not coming down to stop me, but He's going to stop me, with words, through my parents. I hope it works. Until then, I'll repent and seek redemption and hope Karma doesn't get me.

4 days of success and then comes the pit

And just when it seemed liked I had moved over my addiction to masturbate, it all came back. I survived four days with out masturbating and it felt great. I didn't feel like doing it because I thought I had 'grown up' but I guess its not that easy. Just a little hint, and I was all over my penis. I need to sort this out. Though writing has helped me a lot in the regard.  My next target would be to not to masturbate for two weeks, though I'll try to go for a month! May Allah Almighty help me in this matter.